🦠 Epstein Bar 🍺

Where Everyone Gets a Little Sick

Welcome to the most infectious watering hole in town! Our unique establishment combines the long-lasting effects of the Epstein-Barr virus with the social atmosphere of your favorite neighborhood bar. Once you visit, you'll never quite feel the same again.

🍹 Signature Cocktails

• Mono Mule - Our twist on the Moscow Mule (warning: may cause fatigue)
• The Fever Dream - A warm cocktail that lingers for weeks
• Swollen Glands Gimlet - Refreshing but hard to swallow
• The Chronic - A drink that keeps coming back

🍕 Bar Snacks

• Tired Wings - They just don't have the energy to fly
• Lymph Node Nachos - Uncomfortably cheesy
• The Kissing Disease Dip - Highly contagious appetizer
Hours:
Monday - Friday: 6pm - Late (or until you feel too tired to continue)
Saturday - Sunday: 4pm - Very Late (symptoms may persist into Monday)